Why We Keep Saying Sorry (And What It’s Really About)

Nat Creasy
Nov 10, 2025
3 min read

Nat gazing at a serene ocean sunset from a wooden deck. Sky transitions from bright yellow to soft purple hues.

Inside Nat's Notebook - Real Reflections for Real Change

You wake before the alarm.

The light sneaks through the blinds, and your brain is already off to the races.

Did I send that email? Did I sound too blunt?

What’s for dinner tonight?

Why am I still so tired?

You scroll, sip, smile, and slide into another day of holding it all together.

By mid-morning, you’ve already said it half a dozen times.

“Sorry I’m late.”

“Sorry, I look tired.”

“Sorry, can I just…The list of sorrys is long!

It slips out before you even notice, it is sneaky like that. You don’t mean it, not really, or do you?

Beneath the Habit

Here’s the thing: “Sorry” isn’t always about politeness. It’s about safety.

Somewhere along the line, we learned that being likeable meant being safe.

That peace was more important than honesty.

That our own comfort can wait if it means keeping everyone else happy.

So we became experts at smoothing things over. We shrink a little to fit in, soften our voice, swallow our needs. We apologise for existing too loudly, for taking up space, for being human.

But every unnecessary sorry keeps your body in a quiet hum of stress, like a low static that never really switches off.

A signal whispering, “Tone it down. Stay agreeable. Don’t rock the boat.”

And after years of that, your body doesn’t wait for your mouth anymore. It just flinches.

It’s Not Weakness, It’s Conditioning

This was never about lacking confidence. It’s about survival training.

If you grew up in a world that rewarded niceness over truth, compliance over clarity, you learned to apologise as a form of protection.

That little word became your armour. But armour is heavy when you wear it every day. It starts to silence the parts of you that make you feel alive.

You know that lump-in-your-throat feeling before you say no?

That’s your body remembering what happens when you disappoint someone.

That’s not personality. That’s your nervous system.

And it can be retrained.

🧡 Relearning Worth

This is where the real work begins, not in forcing yourself to “stop saying sorry,” but in noticing when it comes from guilt instead of grace.

You don’t owe the world a constant apology. You owe yourself honesty.

So next time it bubbles up, pause.

Feel your feet on the floor.

Take one slow breath and ask:

What am I trying to protect right now?

Nine times out of ten, it’s not the other person. It’s your sense of worth.

And here’s the beautiful thing: the moment you start honouring that worth, your nervous system softens into safety. Which means your breath deepens. You start feeling comfortable in your own skin again.

That’s when calm stops being something you chase, and becomes something your body remembers.

#RebelMoment

Catch one sorry today before it escapes. Swap it for truth.

“Thanks for waiting.”

“I can’t right now.”

Or, say nothing at all.

It’s small, but it’s revolutionary.

That pause tells your body, we’re safe now.

That’s not just confidence. That’s regulation in action.

The Real Invitation

This is what we explore every week inside Soul Sessions: What happens when you stop apologising for existing, and start living from the inside out.

We don’t “fix” the habit. We feel through it, together, and that brings lasting change!

We teach your body how to trust itself again. We talk about the science (because knowledge is power), but more importantly, we experience it because that is where real change happens.

You’ll laugh, connect with others, feel less isolated immediately and start noticing that your body, the same one that’s been saying sorry for decades, finally feels calm without needing external permission.

That’s what nervous system wisdom feels like in practice.

It’s not a mindset shift. It’s a homecoming.

Join Soul Sessions as a Founding Member

Doors close soon. No contract. No cancellation fee. Stay because you love it, not because you have to.

If you’re tired of saying sorry for being tired, and you’re ready to feel the kind of calm that lasts, come join us inside Soul Sessions, where women remember how good life can actually feel.

Here’s to feeling better, sleeping deeper, and living clearer.

See you there, do not miss this awesome opportunity!

LoveLove

Nat x 🧡

Exhausted but still brilliant? You bet you are.

Want some no-fluff, all-heart nervous system goodness popping into your inbox? ➔ Subscribe to Inside Nat’s Notebook, tea and giggles included. [Subscribe]

Are you ready to call time on tired? ➔ Book a FREE Reset Chat. Tea, biscuits, you, me and a little nervous system magic. [Chat with Nat]

It’s lighter on the other side, I promise. 🌟

Nat smiling, sitting barefoot between two palm trees in a tropical setting. She wears a black top and patterned skirt, exuding joy.

Inside Nat's Notebook - Real Reflections for Real Change

You wake before the alarm.

The light sneaks through the blinds, and your brain is already off to the races.

Did I send that email? Did I sound too blunt?

What’s for dinner tonight?

Why am I still so tired?

You scroll, sip, smile, and slide into another day of holding it all together.

By mid-morning, you’ve already said it half a dozen times.

“Sorry I’m late.”

“Sorry, I look tired.”

“Sorry, can I just…The list of sorrys is long!

It slips out before you even notice, it is sneaky like that. You don’t mean it, not really, or do you?

Beneath the Habit

Here’s the thing: “Sorry” isn’t always about politeness. It’s about safety.

Somewhere along the line, we learned that being likeable meant being safe.

That peace was more important than honesty.

That our own comfort can wait if it means keeping everyone else happy.

So we became experts at smoothing things over. We shrink a little to fit in, soften our voice, swallow our needs. We apologise for existing too loudly, for taking up space, for being human.

But every unnecessary sorry keeps your body in a quiet hum of stress, like a low static that never really switches off.

A signal whispering, “Tone it down. Stay agreeable. Don’t rock the boat.”

And after years of that, your body doesn’t wait for your mouth anymore. It just flinches.

It’s Not Weakness, It’s Conditioning

This was never about lacking confidence. It’s about survival training.

If you grew up in a world that rewarded niceness over truth, compliance over clarity, you learned to apologise as a form of protection.

That little word became your armour. But armour is heavy when you wear it every day. It starts to silence the parts of you that make you feel alive.

You know that lump-in-your-throat feeling before you say no?

That’s your body remembering what happens when you disappoint someone.

That’s not personality. That’s your nervous system.

And it can be retrained.

🧡 Relearning Worth

This is where the real work begins, not in forcing yourself to “stop saying sorry,” but in noticing when it comes from guilt instead of grace.

You don’t owe the world a constant apology. You owe yourself honesty.

So next time it bubbles up, pause.

Feel your feet on the floor.

Take one slow breath and ask:

What am I trying to protect right now?

Nine times out of ten, it’s not the other person. It’s your sense of worth.

And here’s the beautiful thing: the moment you start honouring that worth, your nervous system softens into safety. Which means your breath deepens. You start feeling comfortable in your own skin again.

That’s when calm stops being something you chase, and becomes something your body remembers.

#RebelMoment

Catch one sorry today before it escapes. Swap it for truth.

“Thanks for waiting.”

“I can’t right now.”

Or, say nothing at all.

It’s small, but it’s revolutionary.

That pause tells your body, we’re safe now.

That’s not just confidence. That’s regulation in action.

The Real Invitation

This is what we explore every week inside Soul Sessions: What happens when you stop apologising for existing, and start living from the inside out.

We don’t “fix” the habit. We feel through it, together, and that brings lasting change!

We teach your body how to trust itself again. We talk about the science (because knowledge is power), but more importantly, we experience it because that is where real change happens.

You’ll laugh, connect with others, feel less isolated immediately and start noticing that your body, the same one that’s been saying sorry for decades, finally feels calm without needing external permission.

That’s what nervous system wisdom feels like in practice.

It’s not a mindset shift. It’s a homecoming.

Join Soul Sessions as a Founding Member

Doors close soon. No contract. No cancellation fee. Stay because you love it, not because you have to.

If you’re tired of saying sorry for being tired, and you’re ready to feel the kind of calm that lasts, come join us inside Soul Sessions, where women remember how good life can actually feel.

Here’s to feeling better, sleeping deeper, and living clearer.

See you there, do not miss this awesome opportunity!

LoveLove

Nat x 🧡

Exhausted but still brilliant? You bet you are.

Want some no-fluff, all-heart nervous system goodness popping into your inbox? ➔ Subscribe to Inside Nat’s Notebook, tea and giggles included. [Subscribe]

Are you ready to call time on tired? ➔ Book a FREE Reset Chat. Tea, biscuits, you, me and a little nervous system magic. [Chat with Nat]

It’s lighter on the other side, I promise. 🌟

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